Every month in the Jewish calendar, I am focusing some teaching on a different middah. A middah is a ethical character quality, a habit we can work on in ourselves. (Click here for the podcasts, more study material to follow.)
I began teaching last Shabbat about the middah of gratitude. And I'm finding that at least for myself, naming a trait for the month really does draw my attention. So yesterday I found myself at a perfect example of something I mentioned in my Dvar Torah.
I mentioned that when our youngest daughter was just starting to talk, she would say "Thank you" when she gave me her empty plate after eating. She had associated "thank you" with giving and receiving, but was a bit fuzzy on the details. Shouldn't I be thanking her for helping to clear the table?
But in a way, I said, she had this insight: It doesn't matter who says thank you. When a good or helpful deed is being done, everyone can experience gratitude. For being the recipient, for recognizing the power of good inside yourself, for being in an environment where people take notice of each other's good deeds.
That's what I said. So yesterday I had the honor of being a guest at the local Rotary Club lunch meeting. Donations were being given to tens of local organizations. One by one, each recipient got up to say "thank you" to the group. This was after a number of thank-you's and recognitions within the meeting for volunteer work that members had done recently for one another.
Two days before Thanksgiving, it was very powerful to hear maybe fifty people say "thank you" from the microphone, one every 45 seconds or so. And I realized the truth of my teaching, that is doesn't matter who says the words. The organizations were no doubt thankful for the financial support. But it was clear that the assembled gathering of givers were deeply thankful for, and awed by, the work that these organizations do. To hear every 45 seconds about yet another group of people who meet a community need — to know that people like this are out there — was even more powerful
Far from being repetitive, each successive thank you built a higher and higher wave of gratitude, lifting together those who were giving and those receiving.
Leave a Reply